• my child: mum, can you help me with this project?
  • me: no, you're old enough to do these things by yourself.
  • my child: it's a project on harry potter.
  • me: GIVE ME THAT. CANCEL ALL MY APPOINTMENTS. TELL EVERYONE I'VE GONE AWAY FOR THE WEEK. THIS WILL BE THE FIRST A YOU EVER GET, BUCKBEAK.